If your career search has been challenging you’ll want to read this! It’s a little long for a blog post but you won’t regret reading it. On August 6, 2011 I had the privilege of presenting to the Arizona Hemophilia Association and their constituents at their annual state conference. This was a moving experience for me and I wanted to share the speech and some of the career and life stories from people affected by bleeding disorders. Through significant periods of adversity and trials these folks have pushed through to become empowered in their careers and life!
First, I want to share with you the details about hemophilia and von Willebrand disease. Hemophilia is a hereditary disorder in which the clotting ability of the blood is impaired and excessive bleeding results. Uncontrolled internal bleeding can result in pain, swelling, and permanent damage, especially to joints and muscles. Like hemophilia, von Willebrand Disease (vWD) is a hereditary deficiency or abnormality of clotting factor in the blood. It's the most common hereditary disorder of platelet function, affecting both women and men. The disease is estimated to occur in 1% to 2% of the population.
These bleeding disorders present major difficulties for the families affected. Aside from the very serious physical medical issues, career and job issues take front and center stage for those with a bleeding disorder. Why you ask? Solid health insurance is critical due to the astronomical cost of the medication required to treat these disorders.
Empowerment Stories- Life and Career
Introduction
Allow me to take this opportunity to thank Cindy Komar and the staff at Arizona Hemophilia Association for the opportunity to be with you here today.
I still remember over 8 years ago when I got the call from my friend Chris Komar that his son Cade had been born. Chris and I went to college together at the University of Delaware and graduated the same year 2001…(pause for laughs). Anyway, when I got the call about Cade I was excited for Chris, Cindy and Cailin but I could hear a sound of concern in Chris’ voice that was unusual. Chris shared that Cade was healthy but tests revealed that he had hemophilia. He went on to explain the bleeding disorder to me in as much detail as he had at the time. This might have been the first time I heard the word “hemophilia”. Of course I had heard of people who could not stop bleeding but I did not know what that meant or what it would mean for Chris and his family. Today, I know a lot more about the bleeding disorder and this community because an Empowered family shared what they learned along their journey.
My talk today is about Empowerment and more centrally about the lives and careers of a few people who found their way to the nexus of their inner power and shared that really fascinating labyrinth of a journey with others. There are no stories of empowerment that I could tell that don’t have a little adversity and cathartic self discovery along the way. So strap yourselves in for a bumpy 45 minutes!
Let’s start our stories of empowerment with a disadvantaged kid with parents that had an “accident” just after high school. His mom was 19 when she got pregnant and his Dad was just finishing college in the backwoods of the Appalachian Mountains. Yes, this kid might as well have been Loretta Lynn crawling out of the “holler” with bare feet, dirty clothes and a can of moon shine in his hand. He grew up with one leg shorter than the other from standing on the side of a mountain all day long. When he grew up and went to high school he really loved Duran Duran’s music and even let his hair grow long and got it “frosted” so he looked just like his favorite band members. Can you believe this guy? Born in West Virginia and an 80’s pop music lover? That’s two strikes against a life of empowerment…right there! To finish this guy off he lost most of his hair in college and had to go bald. Yes, he became “follically challenged” and then he got the worst job in the world after he graduated----selling credit cards to people over the phone at dinner time! Wow! Stick a knife in the hillbilly loser! And his name is…Chris Barton.
In all seriousness, today is about a challenge to each of you to understand empowerment and how you can live a life to the fullest and most rewarding extent possible. So, let us start with a definition of empowerment. We’ll take a huge LEAP today and I hope that you come with me on that adventure.
Definition of Empowerment-
Providing resources and tools so that the individual can discover and access their innate talents and abilities to achieve excellence and success. This concept defines the awesome capability within humans to overcome adversity and obstacles. Within systems and organizations the individual and their talents are often subjugated to the goals, objectives and cultural norms of the entity or society. Even more detrimental to a state of empowerment are forces such as toxic, close relationships with friends, family members, colleagues and acquaintances that unintentionally poison our mental capacity for hope, excellence and achievement.
If we are to achieve all that we are meant to be. If we are to become truly aware of our inner power we must take a L.E.A.P and we must develop what I call----
A Life Emergency Action Plan
To do this we break the plan into three areas of practice and development. Practice #1 is Engagement and Education. Practice #2 is Attitude and Aptitude. Practice #3 is Planning and Prayer.
Engagement/Education- It is critical to our self-esteem and sense of relatedness to others who can help and support our plans that we take initiative to become engaged and educated on the topics that #1 matter to us and #2 are critical to our life path, success and well being. WE MUST EDUCATE OURSELVES AND ENGAGE in our world to prevent a debilitating life sentence of fear, isolation and decline. This approach often leads us to people and organizations who are experiencing similar circumstances or who are planning for similar greatness! The key here is to seek out people, organizations and communities that provide re-enforcement of a “doer and contributor” mentality. Watch out for the “support groups” that are nothing more than a “woe is me” gathering of the angry, negative and disenfranchised! AHA is a great example of a doer and contributor organization with abundant resources, events, programs and a keen advocacy agenda. There are numerous opportunities for those in the AHA community to gain access to the positive energy which is advancing this cause in ways that some may have once though were impossible.
I often think of stories that bring points to life. This opportunity will be NO exception to that rule! At Barton Career Advisors our line of work brings us into contact with hundreds of people a year that are experience significant adversity in their lives. In case you are not familiar with the outplacement industry does I’ll share a few details. Outplacement firms work directly with companies who are actively planning to reduce their workforce. In layman’s terms they are going to fire a lot of people. Our firm provides career transition services to people who have lost their job and in many cases job loss comes with a host of other circumstances and situations- substance abuse, family issues, mental illness the list goes on and on. Our role in the career transition process is to help people find their power, their understanding for what needs to be done AND what they need to learn to become effective at finding their next career. In short, our goal is to ENGAGE these folks in activities that improve their knowledge of job search techniques and the skills required to move ahead. What’s the result? Professionals who are confident and EMPOWERED to go out and capture the success they so richly deserve. You see…it’s really not abilities and skills that are really in question with some of our clients. It’s their ability to BELIEVE they have the ability and skills to do what is necessary. Education and engagement has a way of bringing out that belief!
One of our clients came to us in early 2009 just after we launched the business. This story still brings out a lot of emotion in me. Let’s call him “Steve” for the sake of the story. Steve had just been through 20 months of a living hell. He’d changed jobs four times while supporting his wife who had aggressive colon cancer. His wife insisted that he become more focused in his job search and she had begun plans for Steve and the kids to have a life without her. Steve was broken but was prayerfully focused on his wife’s recovery and fulfilling her wishes that he aggressively pursue his next career move. We worked with Steve through a series of career assessments and personality tests. We worked diligently to understand his accomplishments so we could convey them in a compelling way on his resume and other career documents. We connected him to decision makers in his field to launch productive conversations that would hopefully lead to his next opportunity. We acted as advisor, coach, counselor and teacher. Ultimately Steve did land in a new role and through ENGAGEMENT and EDUCATION. But his words say it best-
"As I stepped into the office at Barton Career Advisors for the first time, the career and personality assessments, to the resume input, presentation and completion, to working with their team has been a life-changing experience. BCA gathered accurate, factual information about me and my past work experiences and then presented the results to me in such a way, that I immediately regained my self respect and confidence that had been missing for the last 3 years of my life. The experience with everyone at BCA completely removed my fear of the process of searching out a new career. My new, reformatted resume from Barton Career Advisors allowed me to look directly into the mirror and see the reflection of a successful, self-confident man who will bring in a high level of professionalism and accomplishments to benefit his new employer. I walked into Barton Career Advisors a tired, worn down and insecure man, and today I am walking tall and I believe in myself. I am very excited about my future. Thank you all for giving me back the zeal for life."
Heinrich Family Story
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| From Left Julie, Paul, Paul Jr. and Chad Heinrich |
Another story of Education and Engagement comes from a family that is in the AHA community and this one hits a little closer to home. Paul Heinrich, his wife Julie and two sons Paul and Chad know what it means to get ENGAGED and EDUCATED about a life ever changed BUT not limited by von Willebrand disease. I was fortunate to have the opportunity to learn more about their story speaking with Paul this past week. Julie was diagnosed as a young adult and Chad also shares von Willebrand with his mom. The Heinrich family IS ENGAGED in the bleeding disorders community and they have become EDUCATED about the disease that affects their lives daily. Julie always says to her husband Paul, “If I am going to complain about something I am not going to be a complainer. I am going to be a part of the solution” Julie is co-founder of “Bleed Hers” an organization devoted to bringing awareness to bleeding disorders as they affect women and girls. AND it was ENGAGEMENT at her church that led Julie and her family to the doctor that would save her life. After life changed at Pine Top nearly twelve years ago and Julie was almost lost to an allergic reaction to antibiotics she and her family ENGAGED in a brighter EDUCATED future. Today Julie is studying nursing and Chad….well….he is a normal 12 year old that loves swimming and being active…just as he should be. Earlier this year the family attended the National Hemophilia Conference in New Orleans to continue their growth together. Bravo!
Attitude/Aptitude- This brings us to my second major point in defining the necessary ingredients for an empowered path. Our ATTITUDE is the #1 differentiator and strategic advantage in this journey we call life. Interestingly enough, it’s also the factor that many of us unwittingly allow to be high jacked by the flood of antagonistic, hopeless messages around us! This putrid, deluge of adverse proclamations surrounds us at every turn. I mean really, have you turned on the news lately? There is something to be said for staying informed but for goodness sakes, when you turn on the TV or computer and can’t escape the apparent end of our economy, the decline of western society, the threat of nuclear war, terrorism, bio-terrorism, global warming, global cooling, the debt crises, crashing airplanes, the rising price of oil, the reasons you are too fat, how good that 52 year old gut from P90X looks and the apparent lack of an incomplete life if you do not possess an i-phone, i-pad or a 3-D TV…….well? What kind of a sewer swamp defeated mind do you think we are going to possess? Add on top of all this our own daily personal struggles and difficulties and you have the recipe for what I like to call “attitudinal disintegration”. What does this mean? It means that you’ve lost judgment and control over the most valuable real estate known to man---the 6 inches between your left and right ears! That’s right at the end of the day.
Running tangential to the importance of our Attitude to our empowerment is the concept that we need to increase our Aptitude to grow our competency in all areas of our lives. We need to increase our Aptitude (i.e. our knowledge and skill) at work, at home, at school, at church, in our communities, in our relationships, in our physical and emotional well being and in our spiritual growth. Just a rhetorical question, ever seen a person with a negative, entitled to everything, “the world owes me” attitude being open to new thoughts, ideas, feedback, criticism or information which would otherwise improve their ability to grow and handle the future with optimism and competency? No way! Attitude and Aptitude are inseparable by definition but not 100% tied by a direct correlation. Specifically, you can make up for a lack of knowledge, life advantages and skill by controlling your Attitude and outlook. In short, we can’t fill our minds with horse manure and expect to produce a life filled with sweet chocolate pudding! Famed motivational speaker Zig Ziglar once said that it’s your “Attitude not your Aptitude that determines your Altitude”. I love the quote but I think the two are VERY closely related.
Matt (again name protected) was a client of our firm in 2009 and came to us after a losing a senior executive level position with a global chemical services company. In short, Matt had lost the power of controlling his Attitude to influence his prospects for a successful career transition. We met Matt at a networking event through a chamber of commerce networking event. He described to us how he’d “lost his confidence” and needed to “turn around his situation”. Matt said it best in his own words after he found empowerment and confidence once again-
“...after many months of frustrating and futile efforts in my job search, I attended a formal local networking event with one single objective in mind: To meet at least one person who could help turn my situation around. This objective was achieved in the first person I met that evening, Chris Barton. I followed up with Chris immediately after the event and decided to engage his services to help me rebrand myself. This was actually the best decision I had made in months. Besides being great to work with, Chris not only helped me develop a renewed confidence in myself, but also was able to help me make my search more purposeful and targeted. I was also extremely impressed with his professional rewrite of my credentials. In the end, I felt extremely good about "my brand" and the results began almost immediately. Within one or two months, I made several connections which led to my creating my own consulting firm. Now I am providing consulting services to one of the World's most recognized brands from the financial services industry...a company who also it happens has asked me to come on as a permanent employee. I credit Barton Career Advisors for helping jump start my success!”
Another inspiring story of Attitude drives Aptitude is from another member of the AHA bleeding disorders community, Tony Hernandez. For those of you that do not know Tony he has hemophilia and is HIV positive. I had the honor of speaking with him earlier this week. He shared the following thoughts-
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| Tony Hernandez |
“I am a very stubborn guy but I think that has made me successful”. Tony went on to share with me “Chris, most people have a low pain threshold. Something gets painful and they just stop trying. If you just push through, you’ll get through it.” I am inspired by Tony’s Attitude and even more inspired by his commitment to increasing his Aptitude and learning around his bleeding disorder and health. Since he was 16 years old Tony has been involved in AHA and now runs his own home health care company, Reliance Factor of Arizona with another investor. From one of Tony's recent blog posts he shines a light on his contagious and positive influence-
“All the great home run hitters also have another stat that they lead in that no one likes to talk about; strikeouts. To succeed in anything you have to make mistakes. A lot of them. It is very uncomfortable and this discomfort, I believe, is the #1 reason people fail when trying new things. Why? Well tell me if you enjoy any of these things.
-Looking foolish to others as you struggle.
-Feeling dumb. Getting frustrated.
-Not making any perceived headway.
-Getting bored.
-After failing and failing, you try again and fail again.
-Feeling dumb. Getting frustrated.
-Not making any perceived headway.
-Getting bored.
-After failing and failing, you try again and fail again.
Now imagine all this happening… everyday. Doesn’t sound like much fun does it? Well anyone who got good at anything had to go through all these trials and tribulations. And if you want to succeed at any of your goals, you will too. But I do have some good news. It’s not as bad as it seems.” Thank you Tony for sharing with me.
Planning/Prayer- I have often said to clients, colleagues, friends and family members, how can you plan for the future if you are not willing to make a to-do-list today? We have a duty to be good at planning because we need a road map to get to where we desire to be. I am always amazed when I watch those who plan diligently for a vacation or a wedding, or even the 100 million people in the US that have a GPS in their cars or on their cell phone. These people will not walk out the door without a sense of where they are going in their car or what flavor cake they are going to have at their reception but they can’t seem to come up with an integrated, specific, measureable, time-bound plan for their future. It was Yogi Berra who said, “You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.” I don’t think that I’ve ever heard this concept brought to life in a more compelling way. Yes, it’s true that planning is integral to an empowered life. However, you’ve heard it said, and I think it was Woody Allen that if you want to make God laugh you should tell him about your plans!
With that said I’ll tread lightly on the concept of prayer because I know there is a tremendous diversity of religious beliefs out there. But, I truly believe if you want to feel a sense of empowerment in your life then you may want to allow for a connection between your plans and the master planner. At minimum we need to permit time each day for quiet reflective meditation. Nelson Bolles the famed career expert and author wrote-
“Your first Mission here on Earth is one which you share with the rest of the human race, but it is no less your individual Mission for the fact that it is shared: and it is, to seek out and find, in daily -- even hourly -- communication, the One from whom your Mission is derived. The Missioner before the Mission”
The principle here is simple, but certain. If you want to achieve anything in life you need to PLAN and while you are at it, why not ask for spiritual, meditative guidance in making it all possible. We get in touch with our awesome power to change our place in this world WHEN we create a solid set of goals and allow for daily time to meditate and visualize what it will be like when we get there. As we spend time together this afternoon in our sessions for Career Emergency Preparedness Planning and Interview Skills we will build on the foundational tenet of planning and self-knowledge to ensure career success. I am looking forward to sharing that information.
I’ll take this opportunity to share a little of my own personal career story over the last couple of years. Back in early 2008 I was writing down my goals for the year. At the time, I was the Chief Administrative Officer for a $50MM educational company called ComputerTraining.com. I wrote down only two to three things on the list. This was my plan for 2008. One of the items on the list was- “Launch Barton Career Advisors”. I am not sure why I did this but I changed planners shortly after this and placed the old planner with my written 2008 goals in my desk. I never looked at that list again throughout the year. But….I DID regularly say a prayer throughout the year silently to myself. “God, help me to be a good leader, help me to make wise decisions for my career and my future, help me to be a good father and husband. Come into my heart and mind keep me humble and mindful of your plan for my life.”
In December of 2008 I started designing logos for the launch of Barton Career Advisors and contacted an attorney friend to form a limited liability company to launch the business. In April of 2009 the whole world was embroiled in financial crises. The market for student loans was in freefall and the loan approval rate for ComputerTraining.com’s core student customer fell dramatically nearly over night. In short, we could not get funding or loans of any kind to make it possible for our target client to attend the school. On April 9, 2009 I woke up and just knew what I was supposed to do. I left my job and launched Barton Career Advisors to fulfill my life plan and mission. The business closed in December of that same year. I am sure that action conquers fear and I am sure that planning and prayer will play a role in helping you find an empowered life, full of the success, love and career that you so richly deserve.
Today I challenge you to Take a LEAP and create an Emergency Action Plan to empower your life. Through the practices of
1. -Engagement and Education
2. -Attitude and Aptitude
3. -Planning and Prayer
You WILL be empowered. My hope and wish for each of you is that you can turn the word Empowered into the three words- “I have Power”. You do have the power. Stand up and take it. Thank You very much.
